What is the best way to ask a girl out?

So you like someone and you really wish you knew if you have a chance. You think about the last time you met, your crush’s personality, the way they look and of course, you wonder if they like you back. You’re not alone! That situation is stressful for everyone and sometimes even scary: how will you ask them without looking dumb or embarrassing yourself, and how will you increase the chance that they say yes?

We collected a few tips for the best way to show you’re interested. The best way to do it is with honesty and confidence, and we’re here to explain why and how.

Be confident, but not arrogant

Looking very nervous when you ask her out will create a stressful atmosphere and increase the chances she’ll refuse. The best way to ask a girl out is with confidence.

Let’s be honest: most of us prefer to be around positive people who have trust in themselves. Confidence implies that a person is independent and has lots of emotional energy to invest in us. In contrast, someone with low self esteem can make us feel responsible for their happiness. She may think, ‘if I say no, this person will be devastated and hurt’. Then she already feels sad about hurting you. She may even feel guilty or nervous. Give her the impression that whether she says yes or no, you’ll be just fine – or better yet, be content no matter the outcome!

On the other hand, don’t ask with arrogance. Don’t make her feel like you’re better than her or like her answer doesn’t interest you, because that’s NOT TRUE. Which leads us to the next point…

Be honest

Honesty is efficient. Anyone can lie but only for so long – the truth will always shine through. Honesty allows both you and her to face reality on reality’s terms. So when you ask a girl out, say what you feel with honesty. Meanwhile – don’t be overbearing and don’t talk until her ears fall off. For example, if you think about her so intensely that you can’t sleep at night, it’s better to say ‘I’d been thinking about you’ without inviting too many emotions. If you think that going on a date will make you the happiest person alive, how about just saying, ‘I’d be very happy if you went on a date with me’. This is about walking the thin line between honesty and oversharing.

Keep it simple

Why not approach this complicated and stressful task – simply? Maybe she likes you too, and is nervous about it. Or maybe she had one of THOSE days, when complicated decisions are not easy to make. Keep it simple. We suggest something like: ‘Hi, I really enjoyed [some activity you had in common] with you and wonder if you’d like to have a coffee sometimes’. Or, say ‘you’ve been on my mind, and spending more time together will make me really happy’. We only live once, so why not give it a shot? You might just be positively surprised!